Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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