I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
dude i'm inner monologue high
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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