Well apparently he's into motor boating.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
