So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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