I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
