you would pick up someone in the library
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
