well you can't waste a boner
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
