Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
