i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
