Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
