We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I'm gonna fight the coyote
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