She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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