He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I think your dad took our porno
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
