I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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