I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
