question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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