PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
