No stitches, just platelets and will power
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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