In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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