Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
