Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
