she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Randomize
