i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize