I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
