i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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