Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
