Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
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