at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
How's work?
Spinning.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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