You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
