i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize