Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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