If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I cockslap morals
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Randomize
