Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
