I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
