Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
