i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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