i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
