I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize