Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
