dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Found your dick twin last night
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
