I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
