Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
