mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
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