omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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