at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
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