she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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