Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
