i permit you to call me
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
