If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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