we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
