sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize