Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
